This, Ladies and Gentlemen, Is What We Call Falling Out of Being

So yea, recovering from last week's absolute retardation of a blog, I'm here to talk again.

Ever wonder why everyone thinks differently? We see basically the same things happen in our every day lives but we approach them and react to them all different.

I've been writing songs lately just to drain my head of everything it seems to like to think about, and I just can't seem to escape the pure chaos that is my thought process. I have a semi-easy life, I know that, and I know I shouldn't feel as pressured as I do, but it's hard to break away from the ion changes that mandate my every move.

I have an amazing band/group of friends, I love someone unconditionally for the first time in my life, my family is crazy as ever but I still love them, and I'm into college, I really have nothing to worry about, but the last 4 days have been hell on earth for me.

Why do I see everything so grey and bleak? Why am I so pessimistic?

I wish I had an answer, and that would make reading this blog less of a LiveJournal entry, but I can't help you there, and I doubt you can help me. My brain has this weird way of covering all grounds so even help seems pathetic because it's oh-so-clever.

I'm gonna leave this blog with a song that I wrote last night...

Untitled
"I thought I could hide it
But it's eating me alive
These misplaced trusts I've put in you
Are killing me inside.
Cuz I've instilled false prophets
Who claim the truth is theirs to tell
And you're buying ever word
I've given them to sell.

I can't handle
Watching this crumble
My soul is trapped inside this cage.
I've poured the blood from my heart
Into this porous container
To leak the secrets I've held too long.

Now it's out in the open
Jump to your conclusions
I've lied to you all, but it's all an allusion
To me.
And my trust condition
What else can I say?
I need to let go of this foundation.

I can't handle
Watching this crumble
My soul is trapped inside this cage.
I've poured the blood from my heart
Into this porous container
To leak the secrets I've held too long.

Call me out...
Wear me down...
Cuz I'm not worth all the hype surrounding me...
The words I say...
Like they speak of change...
When all I really want is something to stay the same..."

And yes, I'm sorry, it's copyrighted Rene Legault and Fall Hero Fall, I recorded it acoustic last night. You can't steal it.